March Ellie-isms & Zach Attacks

Happy April! The first of the month means a review of the last. Here are some of my favorite kid quotes from March. Enjoy!

Ellie: “I put chopsticks on my lips all the time when they’re dry.”
(This is not about dry chopsticks, but rather dry lips and chapstick.)

Zach: “Daddy’s a boy and Ben is a boy and I’m a boy. I think that means Ben and Ellie’s brother are TWINS!!”

Ellie: “I have an idea for a new project! We take celery and pop on a head, and it’s a camel! Camels say ‘uuuuuurrrrr!!’ U-R urrrrrrr. Do camels have legs?”

Me: “Oh, no. A bird pooped on the car.”
Ellie: “Are we allowed to say bird poop?”
Me: “Well — ”
Zach: “POOP! Poopy! Poopy! Poopy! Poopy! Poopy! BIRD POOP!”

Ellie: “Mom, I need to go to bed now. I have five things I’m sick about today. One: my eyes are itchy, and I can’t see. Two: my ears are funny, and I can’t hear well during the night. Three: I can’t smell well. Four: I have a teef-cut. And five: my fingernails are a little bit hurty.”
(It’s allergy season. I’m not sure what a “teefcut” is, but I think it has something to do with biting her cheek. Maybe.)

Zach: “But I’m not tired because — One: I’m hungry. And, two: I don’t want to.”
(Obviously, counting is a big deal around here.)

Zach: “Only pee-pee came out. I think my poopy went to the library in my tummy. He’ll go downstairs later when he’s ready to come out.”
(I have no idea where he got the idea for compartmentalizing his body, but I think it’s so funny! We call our upstairs loft “the library”, so maybe … yeah, I don’t know.)

Me: “Ellie, what do you want to wear today?”
Ellie: “Oh, Mom, I can’t! My mind and my thinking mind are fighting, so I can’t think.
Me: “Huh? What are they fighting about?”
Ellie: “My mind and my thinking mind … (grunt) want a clean basketball, but … oh! They can’t get the mud … My thinking mind … and then my walking mind said — (grunt) … Ah, that’s better.
Me, laughing: “Are you okay?”
Ellie: “Yeah. I want to wear my Tinkerbell shirt, but my eating mind wants some peanuts. Can I have some peanuts?”

And in case anyone has doubts about sinful nature, this is what my cherubs said yesterday:

Zach: “We need to find money.”
Me: “Why?”
Zach: “To put in our piggy banks.”
Ellie: “And we found LOTS!”
Zach: “Yup, yup.”
Me: “Where?”
Ellie: “In your room!”
Zach: “You gots lots of purses!”
Ellie, conspiratorially whispered as they walked away: “Don’t let Mommy interfere. We’re gonna steal all her monies!”
Zach, with a menacing laugh: “Yeah! You look in her guitar and I’ll check her shoes. Ha, ha, ha!”

Talk to me!

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