Category Archives: time
How to Find Time for Everything
“Do not love sleep or you will become poor; Open your eyes and you will be satisfied with food.” — Proverbs 20:13
This verse has always bothered me because I do love to sleep. It may be because I have such awesome dreams. Some day I’ll tell you about the one where Courtney Cox — who played God — helped me save African orphans by finding a secret door down a city street that led to a land of giant mushrooms. That was fun! Hmmm … maybe I should keep my dreams to myself. I promise I’m not on drugs. I just have a very vivid imagination and an incredibly active REM cycle.
Nobody wants to be poor. Some people take this verse to an extreme claiming that the only people who are poor are so because they’re too lazy. That’s absurd and not at all what this verse means! The point of this verse exceeds economics. Yes, it says “food,” and food is generally tied to wealth, but the point is not bounty; it’s satisfaction. Satisfaction comes in many forms.
Everywhere I go I hear people lament their lack of time. “Oh, I would love to read more! I just don’t have the time.” …
“I wish I could play with my kids more, but we’re just so busy.” …
“I haven’t the time to be creative.” …
“I’ve always wanted to learn to play piano. If only I had time …”
It’s funny how many of these people always find time for Words with Friends or watching their favorite TV shows.
One of my favorite quotes — and I wish I knew who said it — is this: “There’s never enough time to do all the nothing we want.” Read the rest of this entry
Like this:
Homeschooling is easier.
There.
I’ve said it.
I never thought I would — not in a million years — but there it is.
I always thought homeschooling was too much work and that I could never do it. That the pressure would drive me insane, and the lack of personal time and space would drive me to DYFS. I felt unqualified and stifled by the possibility. The mere thought made me nervous, like a thousand little ants crawling beneath my clothes.
But I was wrong. I can do it. And I did do it. And I actually really liked it. In fact, I can now admit that homeschooling is easier.
The truth is that I hate being at the mercy of not one, but multiple teachers’ schedules and agendas. I hate being responsible to someone else for my kids’ presence at all times. I hate having to explain myself to others and submit to their policies and requirements. (Seriously? My kids can’t have cupcakes at a birthday party any more?) I hate knowing that the public school works for me and is paid by me yet believes they know better than I what’s best for my children.
I hate forcing my kids to do homework that I know is too easy for them. It takes hours — I kid you not. — of cajoling, bribery and raw frustration to get them to finish their boring assignments. And I don’t blame them. The poor kids have been stuck in an institutional brick building for six hours after which I immediately ask them to sit down and do more work. It’s torture for them, but perhaps more for me. I don’t blame the teachers, either! They’re doing their jobs and I’m thankful for it. Read the rest of this entry
The 10-Minute Post
I am giving myself precisely ten minutes to write something here and I’m going to try my best not to edit it.
Why would one do this, you ask. Well, I don’t know exactly, except that I feel a nudge to post something and I that’s all the time I have before I must leave to get in line for pick-up at school. (I really miss being able to walk to school.)
My last post was about this awkward idleness that seems to have overtaken me. Some of you mistaken took my ramblings to mean I have nothing to do. (HA!) I actually have a butt-load lovely host of activities that should be occupying my time and I am trying to be disciplined and methodical about attacking them. No, I haven’t created a written list (or as is typical in my case, an overly-elaborate spreadsheet), but I have ticked logged a number of mental notes. Some wise, experienced moms who have already survived this first phase of empty nest have begged me strongly encouraged me to take my time in filling my time. My brilliant husband has advised the same. So I’m trying to revel in this time, take it slow and prayerfully consider how best to fill these silent hours.
And they will be filled, I have no doubt.
For starters, I am teaching a new Bible study this fall. A group of women from my community will be joining me every other Wednesday night for a dive into the Old Testament book of Judges. If you care to join us, we’ll be using this book. I plan to post our progress and major discussion points on the Thursdays following our meetings.
Three minutes left. I’ve already failed at the “no editing” challenge.
The kids have completed their first week (four days, actually) of school. During that time I thought of many, many things I could do while they’re there. Things I haven’t done in a very long time. Some things I don’t remember ever doing.
Like getting my hair cut on a weekday afternoon.
Or going shopping without first checking my purse’s supply of juice boxes, raisins and/or graham crackers.
I could drive into the city and hit a museum or two.
Or go to Victoria’s Secret and actually buy the things I want to buy without having people give me that “Hey, woman behind the double stroller! Haven’t you had enough yet?” look.
Oh, the possibilities … Of course, the things most forefront in my mind are finishing up the hundred projects started around the house, writing reviews for the two rather large stacks of books beside my bed and keeping up with a new year of public school. And one of these days I will eventually get back to those books I’ve started but never completed.
Time. It is stretched out before me with endless possibilities.
God, grant me an abundance of wisdom so that I may not waste a drop.
And time’s up.
A Kindle Giveaway and a Great New Book
My husband tells me I’ve become a Kindle evangelist. It’s not that Kindles are the bees knees, necessarily. I mean, it’s not the device that I adore. It’s the ease with which I can enjoy what I truly adore: reading. I love my Kindle, but only because I really, really love books.
Debora Coty’s release party delights me. She’s giving away a Kindle AND a great book! Details for the giveaway are below. Let me tell you about the book first.
Too Blessed to Be Stressed
You want Debora Coty’s book because:
- It’s cute!
Okay, so “cute” isn’t a #1 reason to buy a book, but it does make a difference. The small size and colorful pages make me want to pick it up and fill my mind and heart with the great insights held within. - It’s packed with biblically-sound advice, loads of Scripture and fun quotes from all sorts of people.
- Short, manageable chapters.
Always less than five pages. You can read a chapter while cooking dinner or waiting in line at the store. Back to the “cute” point, this book fits nicely in any purse.
- Practical tips from someone who knows.
Think your life is nuts? Check out this author’s bio: speaker, author, piano teacher, orthopedic occupational therapist, writing instructor, tennis enthusiast, wife, mother and pet owner. Yup. She understands stress. Better: she shares in this book how we can deal with it in healthy, God-honoring ways. - It’s very, very funny.
Funny doesn’t seem to wrap it up. Witty seems too lofty.
Just read it. I loved it.
Read what other reviewers are saying here.
Too Blessed to be Stressed is a fun-filled read overflowing with insights and practical tips. Perfectly delicious for living happily ever after!
-Rhonda Rhea, best-selling author of Whatsoever Things Are Lovely
Debora has created a “Too Blessed” prize package worth over $150! One grand prize winner will receive:
* A brand new Latest Generation KINDLE with Wi-Fi and Pearl Screen
* Too Blessed to Be Stressed by Debora Coty (for KINDLE)
To enter just click one of the icons below. Hurry! The giveaway ends August 25th. Winner will be announced on the evening of the 18th during Debora’s De-Stress Facebook Party! Debora will be hosting a “life-preserver” chat (it’s okay if you haven’t read the book – who knows, you might WIN a copy!), testing trivia skills, swapping funny stories, handing out some decom-stress tips, and giving away tons of great stuff! (Chocolate, books, and more!) Hope to see you there. Bring your friends and join the fun on August 25th at 5:00 PM PST (6 PM MDT, 7 PM CDT, & 8 PM EDT).
Also – be sure to check out Debora’s series of Stress-Buster videos at her website: www.deboracoty.com. She’s also hosting a photo caption contest on her blog for a chance to win a copy of Too Blessed to Be Stressed.
Like this:
Only Two More Days
Zach’s cast comes off on Wednesday. Only two more days! How exciting is that?
At the risk of sounding like an absolutely despicable mother, I’m a little sad to see this end. Oh, I know last week I mentioned how the time seems to have flown for everyone but us. I talked about how difficult this has been and how we could hardly wait, but now that the end is so near, I have to say time is going by too quickly. It’s not that I want my son to remain bound; it’s just that I have treasured this time with just the two of us. I have relished these moments in which he is so vulnerable and sweet and welcoming my tender care.
Kids grow up in a blink. He turns six next month. Will these be my last days when he actually wants me to hold him? How many more times will I hear that tender voice ask me for help? How long until his independence replaces his desire to cuddle with Mama? Read the rest of this entry
Great Expectations of Discomfort
Life is good and things are moving, but I am struggling to get back to “normal” in this new year. Maybe that’s intentional (not by me, of course, but by our Greater Power). Maybe that’s a very good thing. 2010 was a very interesting year. It stretched our family and our faith. We learned a lot. We hope for more years like it.
With that hope comes a great expectation of discomfort. While we complained and hurt and ached and stressed, we grew much. I truly am torn about this.
I like my routine and I don’t like the idea of losing it. I don’t want all that unsettled chaos to envelope us again. I cringe just thinking about facing another transition. Heather wrote about this recently — possessing the desire to be bohemian and spontaneous, but at the root of things preferring predictability and a touch of mundane. That’s me. I like my safe, comfortable, controlled kingdom. But I’m not here to build MY kingdom.
The flip-side of expecting discomfort is knowing it can produce wonderful results. I get almost giddy to know God may have something bigger and better planned for us. That simple unknown wrapped in fully trusting our mighty Creator is … well, it’s invigorating. It thrills me with the prospect of me having a small part in something spectacular.
And so I sit with baited breath. I refuse to make resolutions knowing I’m not in control anyway. I wait, wondering what in the world God has in store for us this year.
Maybe one of these days I’ll find a way to be consistent even without a scheduled routine. In the meantime, I eagerly anticipate what today may bring.
I choose steak.
It’s only Tuesday and already this week I’ve been bombarded with the same message again and again. I think God’s trying to tell me something. Here are a few hammers that have hit me this week.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.
– Hebrews 12:1-2One of the great uses of Twitter and Facebook will be to prove at the Last Day that prayerlessness was not for a lack of time.
– John PiperIt occurs to me that it is not so much the aim of the devil to lure me with evil as it is to preoccupy me with the meaningless.
– Donald MillerWe need to stop living selfish lives, forgetful of our God. … In the movie of life, nothing matters except our King and God. don’t let yourself forget. Soak it in and keep remembering that it is true. HE IS EVERYTHING.
– Francis Chan
Anyone notice a theme here?
While teaching Bible studies and speaking to women’s groups I have often emphasized the difference between GOOD things and GREAT things. So many of our distractions are actually good things. The problem is that they’re distracting us from that which is so much greater. I’m not going to bash twitter or facebook or the internet. These can be very useful tools. But they can also be colossal time-wasters. As can TV and novels and hobbies and shopping and technology and phones and fashion and … and … and …
I don’t want to guilt anyone into fasting from these distractions. Rather I want to encourage us — you, me, all of us — to remember what is most important and to refuse to allow ourselves to miss out on the great for that which is only good. There is no way I would ever choose taco meat over a steak. And yet I find myself doing it with my time on a daily basis.
I enjoy a good taco, but if I can have steak? It’s a no-brainer!
Unfortunately, the way I spend my time has also become a no-brainer — as in I’m not using my brain. I want to be intentional. I want to be purposeful. I want to choose that which is great instead of wasting my time on things that are less, even if they are good.
I choose steak.
Martha might be on to something.
Today is Day One: the first official day of summer vacation. I am filled with an anxious excitement and a little fear. I’ve gotten so used to our school schedule, which allows me ample one-on-one time with each kid, that now I feel a little lost knowing I’ll have them both all the time for next ten weeks. It’ll be fantastic, I’m sure. But today the task feels daunting.
Carpoolqueen recently wrote about Martha Stewart. The post was cute, but the comments were hysterical. I think all American women harbor a love/hate relationship with Martha. She makes things look so simple that really aren’t. We want to be “perfect” like her, but when we try we realize how utterly ridiculous she is and how impractical her priorities may be. Please note: I’m not dissing the woman. She’s immortal, or at least an alien, and if that works for her, great. But in the real world real human women have real problems. Problems bigger than trying to crease perfect ninety degree angles into our sheets.
I digress.
After reading CPQ‘s blog (and all the corresponding comments about what Martha activity sent real women over the top, thus forcing said real woman to stop watching/reading her), I went about my typical non-Martha day. Until I got to the grocery store. There in front of me was the glossy July issue of Martha Stewart Living. I chuckled to myself, then noticed how the cover advertised a section on cooking lobster (a definitely summer weakness in the Dennis household). I had to buy it. Then I spent the afternoon leafing through its pages, reminding myself how utterly inadequate I am why I don’t buy into her enterprise and “you can do it all” philosophy.
At the front of the magazine she gives her calendar. It’s filled with her daily activities for the whole month: harvesting cucumbers, beans, potatoes and currants; making jams, jellies and pickles; dinner dates, yoga appointments and antique shows. She tells us when she’ll raise her lawn mower blade (you know, because she mows so much herself, she knows exactly when grass growth slows and the season gets drier) and when she’ll move her horses to the East Hampton estate or train the grape vines at “the cold house” (whatever that means). I laughed at seeing not one, but THREE housekeepers’ birthdays. (Seriously. How many housekeepers does she have? Do they all have birthdays in July or are there enough to fill the annual calendar?) And we can’t forget her pets’ birthdays which are oh-so-relevant to my life.
Yes, I was quite morose.
But this morning, as I looked over the horizon into the open expanse of my next ten weeks, I decided Martha might be on to something.
I keep calendars and schedules, but nothing quite this detailed. And never with “mundane” tasks allocated to specific dates. I kinda like the idea. I consistently reasurre Ellie that we’ll make it to story time at the library next time, but then never remember when it is. I want to take the kids to museums and new parks and such, but never actually make solid plans to do it. I have crafts and project ideas roaming the halls of my mind, waiting for the opportunity. But too often they stay there, jailed by my fear of elaborate messes and stressful preparations. I think I’ll make a summer calendar. I’m going to follow (Really? Can I say this?) Martha’s example and free those waiting ambitions, those family memories yet to be made.
Today is Day One.
Mama Loves: Great Quotes (if I can remember them)
I collect excellent quotes. Our pastor gave a great one on Sunday, but I can’t remember it exactly. What’s worse: I didn’t write the whole thing down and now can’t find it online. It went something like this:
“Interruptions are real life. What we believe is real life is often a figment of our imaginations.”
Somebody somewhere said something very similar to that. Since I can’t remember it exactly, let me quote Stuart McWilliam: “Life’s interruptions are life’s opportunities.”
This week I’ve tried to stop and intentionally establish a time of rest and prayer. (Thank you, Kellie, for the challenge!) It’s been much more of a challenge than I expected. Every time I try, I get interrupted. The phone rings. The washer overflows. Ellie needs a drink. Zach needs to go potty. Someone knocks on the door. The kids start arguing and need a referee. I need to go potty. The interruptions never stop. I want an hour, but can’t seem to find fifteen consecutive minutes! I make lofty plans. I have over a dozen posts started (including a mini-series on Bathsheba), articles to write, dreams of planting a garden, cleaning my house, painting the shutters, hosting a brunch, visiting with friends … but can’t find the time to finish a single endeavor. I am always interrupted.
This quote (or at least my remembered version of it) reminds me that my plans are not God’s plans. I may envision quiet afternoons with plenty of time for writing and meditating. More often than not God has very different afternoons planned for me. Ones that involve actively training my children, serving my neighbors and maintaining a suitable, wecloming home for my husband. This doesn’t mean my writing and meditation are unimportant. Just that they may need to wait. And these interruptions may be golden opportunities in disguise.
Prayer Siesta
Why is it so hard to pray?
There are so many things weighing heavily on my heart this week, things I know need prayer. Sick friends, unbelieving family members, marriages — upcoming ones, sustaining ones, breaking ones. (Is anyone else out there grief-stricken over Jon & Kate? I could barely stomach the season premiere this week.) Our nation needs prayer: our politicians, our diplomats, our soldiers, our culture. As the school year comes to a close I want to pray for our kids, our teachers, our summers. So many things! And yet I find it extremely difficult to pray longer than two consecutive sentences.
Maybe praying isn’t the difficult part. Maybe my trouble is the stopping part.
Photo courtesy dreamstime.com
I’ve written about the ineffectiveness of multi-tasking before. It makes us forgetful (because we’re trying to remember too many things at once), distracted (because we’re trying to do too much at once), and ugly in our people skills (because we’re more focused on productivity than relationships). I ascribe to all these things! I know they’re true. I preach them. Yet I have difficulty stopping.
I pray while in the shower, claiming it’s the only place I’m uninterrupted by family needs, but even then I interrupt myself with to-do lists, grocery lists and random thoughts about blogging. I try to blog, but get distracted by thoughts about writing, gardening and what I should wear to swim lessons later this morning. I try to play with my kids but bring my Kindle in case they get bored with me or I get bored with Duck, Duck, Goose and the repetitive swing-pushing. While making dinner, I clean the kitchen, run another load of laundry, catch up with friends on the phone and help the kids finish a puzzle. No wonder my meals are never perfect and my prayer life is dehydrated!
The other day Kellie posted a rest challenge. She calls it S.IESTA!: Stop. Intentionally Establishing Stillness Takes Action. Her purpose is to, over the summer, routinely rest for a set period of time each day, to stop whatever she and her kids are doing and take a break. Now, I don’t have trouble resting. I read all. the. time. I watch tv with my hunky spouse every night, and I play with the kids every afternoon. Rest comes easily to me. Prayer, however, requires a stop. I want to be more intentional with my prayer life. Yes, I pray regularly now, but how much better could it be if I were more purposeful? How much more of what God is doing could I witness if I scheduled time to just talk with Him each day? I don’t mean reading His Word. Anything that involves reading I do with a voracious appetite. But praying. Can I stop — really STOP — each day to pray?
What about you? What can you be more intentional about this summer?
