Category Archives: Speaking

This past Saturday I spoke at a ladies’ event. If you were there, THANK YOU for coming! If you weren’t, I missed you.

Whenever I speak, one question reigns most popular: “How old are you?” Either my topics are terribly boring, or something about my voice and appearance throws people way off. I really should just state my age at the beginning of all my classes. I am happy to say, though, that no one admitted to thinking I was a teenager! Of course, that could be because we met before 9AM and no real teenager is awake at that time on a Saturday. I did get lots of “How can you possibly have kids?” “Aren’t you still in college?” and the ever-present “You’ll be thankful when you’re older!”

For the record, I am 33.

The next most popular comment is this: “You must be so relieved this is over!”

To be honest, I’m not.

I love teaching. Obviously, I’m human, so I do get a little nervous at first, but there is no other place I would rather be than standing in front of a group of people who are eager and excited to learn about God. I love everything about teaching: the preparation, the research, writing studies, compiling notes and playlists and additional resources for further study. I love studying the Bible helping others to do the same. I love pushing people toward a deeper understanding of grace and God and authentic faith.

Lately I’ve noticed a clear delineation between teaching and leading.

Over the years I have fallen into leadership roles in various places: church, school, and community. I do my jobs (relatively) well, but that’s not where my heart is. Being in leadership — you know, the management and administration side of things — completely stresses me. I get overwhelmed easily. I become intimidated and insecure which I counter by getting territorial, bossy and edgy. It’s not the best fit for me. If I have to do it, I do it. But I know there are people who are much, much better at it than me. It’s their gift. It’s not mine.

We all have gifts. Some of us have many. It’s important to know what gifts you have so that you can best be used for God’s glory. The really cool thing is that we like doing what we’re good at. It’s also great that we can grow and change and develop our gifts.

It’s not that I can’t lead. I certainly can. I know how to run a meeting and create some fierce spreadsheets. I know how to delegate and organize tasks, but I would much rather leave all that to those gifted with leadership skills. They can handle all the nitty-gritty details, make the decisions and tell me what to do. I am perfectly content to simply teach. I don’t need to be in charge. I don’t want a title. I just want to be used of God and teaching seems to be the best way for me to do that.

Am I relieved that it’s over? Well, I’m thrilled that it went so well and I’m looking forward to my next opportunity. And I’m hoping it’s never really over.

“So … whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.”
– 1 Corinthians 10:31