Category Archives: child
Lost
Early in the morning, my mother called. She couldn’t wait to tell me what had happened the previous day at work.
Mom works customer service for a big home improvement store. She handles returns and the like right inside the front door. As she stood there working, two men entered. The younger of the two wore dark glasses and held a cane. The older gently guided him to a bench. He helped him to sit then approached the desk. He had found this young man wandering in the parking lot; he was lost and blind. “Can we use your phone?”
“Sure. I can only make local calls. Is it here in Owensboro?”
The dazed young man stood. “Is that where I am? Am I in Kentucky?”
They confirmed, yes, he was. “Where did you think you were?”
“Texas. Fort Worth.” The boy started to sob uncontrollably. How could he have gotten so lost?
Mom called the police then started searching the phone book for anyone he might know. There had to be a reason he was so far from home and someone nearby who knew him. He did have name, so she started there. Going through one by one, she called every number with that last name. Halfway through the list she reached a woman, the young man’s mother. She was, at that moment, on the other line with the boy’s father. Mom told her where he was and promised to watch over him until the father came.
The father was actually in the parking lot. He had left the boy in their truck for just a moment to run into the store. When he returned, his son was gone. He had been scouring the shopping center trying to find him. He ran into the store, tears of relief streaming down his face. Strong arms enveloped his son while a tender voice assured him he was safe.
Mom’s voice cracked and faltered as she told me the story. She was completely moved by the father’s love for his son; by the fear he felt; by the compassion of a stranger to help him find his way home. As I listened, I couldn’t help but see the allegory. Does it sound familiar?
We have a Father seeking us always. God is searching, hurting, wanting nothing more than to protect us and bring us safely home. He may be just a step away, but sometimes in our blindness we fail to see. We are the lost ones. We think we know what we’re doing, but so often haven’t even a clue where we are. Sometimes we need a friend or stranger to help us; maybe even angels protecting us while we wait. Sometimes, after we’ve been found, we need to help others, show them where they are and how they can get home.
Who are you in this play? Are you the lost child? Have you been found? Or are you the stranger helping another to be found?
“But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find Him if you look with all your heart and with all your soul.” – Deuteronomy 4:29 (NIV)
“Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. Then he calls his friends together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’ I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in Heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.” – Luke 15: 4-7 (NIV)
Fifteen years strong
Today is my rebirthday. Fifteen years ago I gave my life to Christ. Some of you have been Christians much longer than I; some of you may be stuck wondering what in the world a “rebirthday” is.
A rebirthday is simply an anniversary; it is the anniversary of being born again. Jesus said “No one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again.” (John 3:3 NIV) He goes on to explain we must be born of the flesh and of the spirit. We are born of the flesh when we exit our mothers’ wombs; we are born of the spirit when we place our faith in Jesus Christ. Faith of what? Faith that what He says is true; what He says, He will do. “For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16) If we put our trust in Him for salvation – not in ourselves, our works or our wealth, but in Him alone – He will give us eternal life as heirs of God. Our rebirthday remembers the day we were born of the spirit, the day God adopted us as His children.
None of this is to say that salvation happens in a day. Sometimes salvation is a process. It can take days or even years for someone to go from doubt to belief. But sometimes it does happen in a day. Sometimes there is a wonderful “ah-ha” moment in which a person is faced with their wicked immortality and God’s amazing grace. It is in that moment a conscious decision must be made: to accept God’s free gift of life and follow Him or to deny His grace and continue without Him. I made the choice to follow God on January 16th, 1992.
I was fifteen and grounded. Some parents threaten their teens with weeks or months of grounding but then recant. My mom grounded me for a year and never recanted. She stuck to her guns and made me stick with the punishment. It changed my life.
Before this disciplinary year began, my life was focused only on me and how to get what I wanted. More than anything I wanted to be a dancer. I wanted to be on Broadway. There was only one way to get from our map-dot of a town to New York: show choir. I worked my way into a circle of friends to help me get in. The problem was they weren’t much help in other areas. I started dating one of the guys who was tight with the director. A free ticket, so I thought. I was invincible and on my way. We started skipping school and lying to everybody. We even got the choir director to defend us and help us get away with it. This wasn’t serious stuff by today’s standards. We weren’t doing drugs or getting drunk. We were kids messing around. He was seventeen; I was fourteen. We thought we had the world in our back pockets – until my mom found out.
She was a single mom working hard to raise her four kids. She couldn’t keep an eye on us all the time, but the neighbors could. The lady across the street noticed my boyfriend’s truck in our driveway long past time for school to start. (This was after my mother had already forbidden me to see him again or have any friends over when she wasn’t home.) Our kindly neighbor lady called Mom to report. It was not a good day. By the end of it, I was faced with no friends, detention at school and a one year grounding sentence. My punishment disallowed me any association with this boy or his family for an entire year. That included any event or group in which he might be involved. So long, show choir. Adios, dance classes, plays and theatre. Good bye, Broadway.
The only social activities permitted were sports or church. I’m not athletic, so basically just church. I resented this from the tips of my toes. I blamed God for my parents’ divorce and didn’t appreciate having Him forced on me. If He really was all powerful, then He should have fixed my family. He didn’t. Instead we were drug through years of painful court proceedings, counseling and public humiliation. In a town that small, everyone and their mothers knew more about me and our family’s drama than I did. It was God’s fault and now, as punishment, I had to sit in church and hear all about Him every Sunday and Wednesday.
I begrudgingly joined the youth group. We had journals to keep and lessons to finish between each meeting. It was meant to teach consistent devotions, quiet times of studying the Bible and praying each day. I usually did the whole week’s worth in one sitting. They were short and this kept my penance to a minimum.
I don’t remember what the lesson was on January 16th. I don’t remember what day it was or what else was going on. What I remember is the verse I read and the thoughts that coursed through my mind.
“For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 8:38-39
If none of these things could pull me away from God’s love, who was I to even try? I am no match for angels or demons or laws and powers. I am nothing and yet I realized, ever since my parents split nine years before, I had subconsciously been doing everything in my strength to abandon God. And in spite of all my efforts, blasphemy and rebellion, He still loved me. He would not allow me to abandon Him. Furthermore, He would never, ever abandon me.
Never before had I been loved like that. Oh, my mother loves me without strings or conditions, but she doesn’t know my heart. She doesn’t see my secret thoughts. God does – and He still loves me. He knows my words before they touch my tongue. He knows my thoughts and actions before I wake each morning. He knows all my faults, embarrassments and ill-conceived pride … and He still loves me! Faced with this kind of love I saw no choice but to embrace it. I confessed my weaknesses before Him and promised to live the rest of my days for His glory. Where He wanted me, I would go. What He asked of me, I would do. I surrendered all my will to Him and have never regretted it.
It has been fifteen years and I am so far from being perfect. Fortunately, I don’t need to be perfect – God loves me anyway. And I continue to put my faith in Him: that what He says is true and what He says, He will do. He says He loves me, and so it is true. He says He will give eternal life to those who believe, and that He will do. Praise be to Him!
If any of this is confusing to you or if you want to know more, please do not hesitate to email me. I would love nothing more than to discuss this with you further. I have found an awesome freedom in knowing God personally. I long to have you know Him too.
Imitators?
Many have called Isabel my “mini me”. She has my sandy-blonde hair, my full lips and my pointy chin. We’re not sure where she got those curls or the brilliant blue eyes, but, for the most part, she is my clone. She possesses more than a few of my mannerisms.
The three of us – Ellie, Zach and I – were outside today. Zachary was sitting in Ellie’s big, old, plastic car. I was relaxing; reading a book. Isabel was trying to convince Zach to get out of the car so she could have it. As I listened, I heard nothing more than an echo of myself. “Zach, honey, you play with this instead?” A little later she leaned over right at his eye-level, “Me no like that, Zach. No, no. You don’t do that.” Her tone was identical to mine.
Sometimes, though, when she does something unusual, I wonder: “Is this a reflection of me, too?” Her afternoon snack one day consisted of a bowl of watermelon and cantaloupe. As I worked on cleaning the kitchen, Ellie found a bowl of half-eaten chocolate Chex Mix. She carefully sprinkled it over all her fruit, then exclaimed: “Ta-da! Mama, look!”
“Oh, is this your new recipe? Very nice.”
“Me call it ‘messy house’. You like it?”
Where did she get that? Is it a reflection of my creative culinary experiments or my dreadful housekeeping skills? No matter. The real question is: what does God think when He watches me? Am I portraying His character in a way that makes Him proud? Or is He wondering where did I get that?
The Apostle Paul gives us a ton of guidelines for righteous living. He lists several specific behaviors and temptations to avoid right here in Ephesians. Go back a bit. The whole section from 4:17 through the end of the book lists item after item. These are the things NOT to do. To sum up all that we must DO, Paul gives us these two verses:
“Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” — Ephesians 5:1-2, NIV
The key to accurately imitating God is to “live a life of love”. If we do that effectively and completely, we will naturally match His character. In that one command we will find unity, peace, wisdom, compassion, charity … all that we need.
So, how are we doing? Does your life radiate God’s love? Are you reflecting all that He is? I know I fall far short, but I’m working on it. Let’s not be sad portrayals of our King. Rather, let us strive to reflect Him with precise clarity. May others see Him in us – in our mannerisms, our tone, our lives, our love.
Like Father, Like Daughter
“Therefore, be imitators of God, as beloved children …” — Ephesians 5:1
As I sat at the kitchen table sorting mail, Isabel entered the room. She announced her presence with loud, clumsy steps in Daddy’s shoes and a low voice, a voice I had never before heard from this two-year-old: “Hello, Mommy! Are you my friend?”
I couldn’t help but laugh. Alright, so her voice was a little off, the shoes were way too big, and her father never calls me “Mommy.” But other than that, she was pretty on with her portrayal. Isabel knows that Daddy’s voice is lower than hers and mine. She knows those are his shoes. On top of that, she hears her parents repeatedly confess they are each other’s best friends.
This is not the only time Isabel has imitated us. She hears everything – as most toddlers do. When my tongue slipped, she walked around the rest of the day yelling “Oh, crap!” to all her toys. Whenever playing with the phone, she must pace – just like her mama. Whenever Rick is watching baseball, she yells “Go Yankees!” regardless of what team is playing. She watches us cook and clean and eat and visit and laugh. She notices every detail and is quick to imitate them, usually with surprising accuracy. She’s a natural.
If Isabel spent all her time with someone else, she may have very different behaviors. Oh, some of it is natural, of course. She does have our genes, but this girl is learning from us. She is watching our example – be it good or bad – and she is copying it. She is fashioning her behavior after ours. All this she could not do without having spent time with us. If she only saw her father once a week, she may not know that he loves to read and watch baseball. In order to be good imitators, time is required.
In the same way, if we want to be imitators of Christ, we must spend time with Him. We must study Him in the same way children study their parents. Once a week is not enough. We must know His character before we can replicate it in our lives. Time is required. Learning another’s character takes a lot of time.
I know we live in a world where time is more precious than all else. There are a million time-consuming demands and never enough time. This, my friends, is something we cannot shelve. It is too important. We cannot put it off until we have more time.
If we want to be imitators of our Father, we must spend time with Him. It doesn’t have to be an hour every morning. It could be ten minutes in the afternoon. It could be on the train going in to work. It could be at 3AM while up with one of the kids. Do it when you can, but do it every day. This is not something to feel guilty about. The truth is the more time we spend with God; the less we have to work at being like Him. We will become natural imitators. Thinking like He thinks will be automatic. Being what He wants us to be will be easy. All because we have been with Him; we have spent time with Him and we know His character.
