Category Archives: child
We have a problem.
Ellie is convinced we’re having a baby. We’re not. Let me say that again: we are not currently planning to have another child. The discussion is not permanently sealed, but right now, conception is not on the agenda. Our daughter believes otherwise. In fact, she thinks babies are already inside me waiting to come out. Oh, yes, we have a problem.
The weather has been great, so we’ve been outside a lot more, walking, going to parks and playgrounds. Ellie infoms every person we meet that we’re having a baby. She’s also decided this baby is a girl and her name is Lily. She’s tells everyone that too. I can’t get her to stop, no matter how many times I interrupt her before innocent passersby are lied to and then begin congratulating me. She just smiles sweetly and tells me once again that she needs “someone to push around.” Her powers of persuasion build muscle as she regales me with stories of her big sister skills and what a great helper she is.
She even told her father we were going to have a new baby. “Where are we getting this baby?” he asked. Her answer: “From Mommy’s tummy. That’s where babies come from, Daddy.”
Last night was the tipping point. I crossed over from “this is cute” to “we’ve got to do something about this.” While cuddling under some blankets Ellie asked me to tell her about when she and Zach were born. I gave the stories in a way that delighted her. She’s only four, so I kept the tales politely G-rated while still offering the excitement her imagination requires. I explained how they grew and grew and then finally decided to come out. Ellie told my body she was ready, but Zach wasn’t quite sure he wanted to come out. We needed to tell him it was time. She smiled, that adorable twinkle in her eye, then cupped her hands around her mouth and leaned against my stomach. “COME OUT, LILY!! IT’S TIME TO COME OUT!!!
Help. Please.
This photo, a flashback to almost three years ago, is courtesy of We are THAT Family and the weekly ‘Fro Me to You linky.
Our Ellie is definitely hoping to recreate the scene. These two have changed a lot, haven’t they? My girl had curls, but no hair! 
Makes me smile.
Desiring God
When kids get sick, they get clingy. Cuddling is great, but I need it in moderation. I like my personal space.
As a mom, I don’t get much. I’ve come to terms with the fact I’ll never use the toilet alone and will seldom take a shower without playing Peek-a-boo at the same time. There will always be someone touching me while I eat (usually with her feet) and another someone trying to steal my bed at night. Even household chores are group projects. I understand this is just the way things are and I’m okay with that. But after days and nights of touching and hugging and clinging and crying and synchronized poop sessions, I need solitude.
Zach understands. He’s an introvert. He likes people, but being with them exhausts him. He needs alone time to re-energize.
I gain energy by being with other adults, but I quickly become drained if my only interaction is with people under three feet tall. After a long day like that, I need quiet to refuel.
And then there’s Ellie. The definitive extrovert, she like a leech feeding off the energy of other people. Take away her social life and she quickly shrivels into a weary fount of tears. She can’t stand being alone. It’s the worse possible punishment for her. It exhausts her and she hates it.
This is why she can’t understand my need. She can’t get enough of me. We’ve had almost two weeks with just me and the kids. You’d think she’d be sick of me, but she’s not. “Mommy, I want you. I miss you. Sit with me. Play with me.” As I stifled another groan from the depths of my I-DON’T-WANT-TO spot, today I recognized the virtue of her affections.
One day in the not too distant future, this daughter of mine will want nothing to do with me. She’ll be too cool to hang with her old lady, and I’ll be wishing for more quality time with her. But for now she’s a child and she adores me. She wants to be with me every second of every day. Why aren’t we more like that with God?
We’re told only those who become like a child will enter the kingdom of Heaven (Matthew 18:3). Children love being with their parents. Moms and dads are the most popular people in the world to a preschooler. So, why aren’t we seeking our Father with as much persistence, passion and enthusiasm?
When I’m on the phone, Isabel is one step behind me the entire time. Sometimes I’m just walking to walk and sometimes it’s an attempt to get away from the kids and actually hear the person on the phone. It doesn’t matter to Ellie. She will chase me, anything she needs to do to make sure she’s with me, walking in my footsteps. Are you chasing God? Are you desiring nothing more than to be in His shadow, walking in His steps? I hope so.
It’s a challenge for me, a source of sanctification and of praise. Isn’t it great God never turns us away because He needs quiet? How awesome that He never tires of spending time with us!
An audience of One
Hey, all! Thank you for your prayers and kind encouragement while I was sick. I am feeling MUCH better — still not 100%, but I’m getting there.
Best friends in the end
A certain song has been running through my mind all week: “Me and You” by singer/songwriter Katie Tarpey. It’s a beautiful piece. She sings of her dreams for the future: bulding a home together with the one she loves. As she envisions children yet to be, she sings of a tire swing and a cardboard-box marching band. Then my favorite line: “We’ll raise them to be best friends in the end.” This is my hope.
As I watch them, I think about the family of God. All believers are children of God; that makes us siblings. Do we get along like that? Oh, I know we have the fights and we throw the punches. We argue over doctrinal differences and appropriate behaviors, but in the end, are we friends? Do we truly love each other?
Isabel and Zach love each other. They really love each other! They have their disagreements, but they always come back to being friends. This is how we should be. We should defend each other the way Zach rushes to protect his big sister if ever he thinks she’s under attack. We should run to help each other the way Isabel hurries to care for Zach if he falls or is hurt. We need to really and truly love each other as brothers and sisters, not just distant family members we have to tolerate.
“Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ is born of God and everyone who loves the father loves his child as well. This is how we know that we love the children of God: by loving God and carrying out his commands.” — 1 John 4:1-2 (NIV)
We cannot love God without loving His children. We cannot love each other without loving God. It’s all entwined. Just something to think about.
Our budding artist
I am so proud of our Isabel! We’ve been working on her letters. Every day she wants to play “school.” We picked up some great workbooks and such from Amazon. She LOVES them! Sometimes kids can do things you didn’t realize they could. Her drawing is one of those “wow!” things for me. I knew she loved to color. I knew she could make some shapes — circles and crosses; lines and dots — but I didn’t believe she was really making pictures until this weekend.
I watched as she narrated this drawing. You’ll see I labeled everything when she was done … ears, eyes, mouth, feet and hands. It may not look like much, but I was ecstatic!
And, last but certainly not least, she drew a picture of Zach. I love his smile and all his hair!
Just had to share this very proud “mama moment” with all of you!!
If you want to see the pictures a little better, just click. They’ll pop up nice and big. *grin*
Father knows best.
“I want that!” Isabel pointed to a huge case of plastic foods. Right next to it sat the nearly-identical set she got last Christmas, the set she rarely plays with. Her voice was filled with conviction, but her father knew better. Rick gently redirected our daughter to another aisle in the toy store.
Sometimes we think we know what we want; we’re desperate to get it. But our Father knows better. He knows us better than we know ourselves – from the hairs on our heads to the deepest desires of our hearts.
Rick knew Ellie didn’t really want more play food. He knew there was something better just a few steps away. He knew there was something else she wanted even more than plastic pizza.
In the same way God gently guides us. Are we following? Do we trust Him to know what’s best for us?
Isabel could have stomped her feet and insisted on having that first sight, but she would have missed out on a greater treasure. If we fight and struggle against God’s will, we, too, will miss treasures. We will settle for less than the best and likely endure pain along the way.
This reminds me of The Tale of Three Trees. Have you heard it? There is a book review on my other site: Christian Children’s Book Review. It’s a timeless tale in which three trees dream of doing great things. Through the course of the book they realize God had bigger plans for them than they could have ever imagined.
We may think we know what we want, but God knows better.
Princess Ellie
Where did “Ellie” come from? Well, as most babies do, she grew in funny proportions. Her belly accounted for all her weight gain for the first few months. Here was this tiny thing with a lovely rotund middle and skinny sticks for arms and legs. Her father thought it appropriate to dub her “Is-a-Belly”. Being one who was called “needle-butt” from infancy through high school, I refused to nickname our child after a body part. We compromised with “Ellie”. It stuck and thus began the family debate.
A few weeks ago, Isabel made her preferences known. Out of nowhere I heard a strong voice proclaim: “My NAME is ISABEL!” After a little discussion another compromise was made. We are now permitted to call her “Ellie”, but only if it is preceded by the necessary title of “Princess”. Otherwise, we are supposed to call her “Isabel”.
I’m actually glad she put her foot down – not necessarily about the princess part, but the rest has forced me to remember why we chose her name in the first place. ‘Isabel’ means ‘consecrated to God’. It was important to me that our children have significant names; names that mean something and will remind me of something. Now that I must call Ellie “Isabel”, I am daily reminded (several times a day!) that she is not mine. She is set apart to God; created to serve Him – and it is my job to prepare her for that purpose!
And Zachary … oh, Zachary! His name means ‘remember the Lord’. His middle name, Luke, means ‘bringer of light’. As I struggle with this strong-willed son of mine, I have no choice but to remember the Lord! My Lord, the Bringer of light … my prayer is one day Zach will be a mighty man of God, bringing the Light to everyone he meets.
Why am I sharing all this with you? Because God has a reason for names. All through Scripture peoples’ names are symbolic, relevant and sometimes ironic. They mean something. God has given us names, too. Here are just a few of the things he calls us:
Saints (Ephesians 2:19) – God’s consecrated people
Friends (John 15:14-15) – close confidants
Children (Galatians 3:25; 1 John 4:7, 5:1) – belonging to and imitating the Father
Heirs (Romans 8:17) – rightful stewards of the King’s riches
Forgiven (Psalm 85:2; Acts 13:38; Ephesians 1:7) – washed clean, blameless
Holy (Ephesians 1:4; Hebrews 12:14) – set apart for a specific purpose
Branches (John 15:5) – growing forth from the Vine (which is Christ)
Body (1 Corinthians 12) – working together, all part of One
We hear these words tossed around all the time, but have we thought about their meaning? Do we live like saints? Are we set apart and holy like we are called to be? Do others view us as forgiven heirs of the King? Hey, maybe Isabel isn’t so far off with her title of princess.
May we, as believers, remember the names God has given us. May we hold tight to their meaning and live to fulfill the expectations set by them.
The Sun Works
Faith is currently the hot topic of my life. We talked about it at MOPS this week; I reviewed a book about faith for CCBReview last week. It even came up during a recent trip to the grocery store.
My conversations with Isabel are always surprising and enlightening. She never ceases to show me new perspectives on life, God, my behavior or society. Her eyes are so fresh and her mind so perceptive. This week was no exception.
As we drove to the grocery store she looked out her window noticed all the snow still on the ground. This is a big deal because she is just beginning to understand seasons. If there is no snow on the ground, she insists winter is over. It could be five degrees outside, but if there’s not snow, to her it is summer. Don’t even try to argue with her — she’s convinced. Instead of saying “Let’s go play in the snow”, she says “Let’s go play in the winter!” Well, seeing all the “winter” still on the ground, she asked me why some people had winter on their grass and others didn’t. I explained the sun had melted some of the snow, but some was hidden in the shade of tall trees or houses and didn’t see the sun as much. This intrigued her. “Mommy, the sun doesn’t like winter?”
“Of course, the sun likes winter. But the sun really likes the summer. Before we can have summer, we need spring. Spring comes after the sun melts all the snow and the flowers start to grow.”
She thought long and hard about this, then in a voice of near panic, she yelled from the back seat: “Mommy! The sun is not working!” Apparently, she had enough winter and wanted spring to arrive in less than five minutes. The concept of faith immediately entered stage left.
“Honey, it doesn’t happen all at once, but it will happen. I promise. It happens every year and it will happen again this year … when the time is right. You just have to trust and have faith.”
Trying to explain faith to a not-yet three-year-old is difficult. There is the comparison to wind: you can’t see it, but you know it’s there; you see its effects. The problem is she can feel wind. She can’t feel spring. She can’t feel God. What is faith? How do I explain such a huge concept to my children?
“Daddy comes home every day, doesn’t he?”
“Yes.”
“Even if you can’t see him leave work and you can’t hear his train whistle, you know he’s coming home. It’s the same with spring. You may not see the sun working and you may not hear the flowers grow, but spring will come.”
At this point she lost interest in faith preferring instead to discuss what kind of grocery cart we should use and whether or not she could get a special cookie. I assured myself the conversation would rise again and I would be more prepared when it did. We completed our shopping and drove home talking about all kinds of toddler topics, mostly her cookie which she now clutched tightly in her hands. Back home, after getting her out of the van, we walked gingerly across the ice and snow. She stopped short at the edge of the sidwalk in a small puddle of melted slush. “Mommy! It’s working! The sun is working just like you said!”
Just a little bit of faith … So often life stresses me. I want to know exactly what God’s plan is for today and tomorrow and all the days to follow. I want to hear an audible voice assuring me that everything is going to fall perfectly into place. Faith is the evidence of things unseen. Just as Isabel is choosing to believe spring will come, I must choose to believe God is in control. That’s faith. And I have plenty of reasons to believe; more than enough evidence to support my faith. Afterall, the sun works.
“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” – Hebrews 11:1 (NKJV)
First Prayers
Zachary is learning to pray. It is the most beautiful thing.
Isabel prayed at a young age, but she has always been a very spiritual child. It is almost as if she was born believing in God. She has never questioned His existence or sovereignty, but rather assumes His presence and gasps in awe at each new thing she learns about Him. Her first prayers seemed a natural extension of her personality. In her soft, silky voice she whispered: “Thank you, God, Mama, Daddy, food. Amen.” Now, more than a year later, her prayers are almost the same as the very first one. She usually prays the same prayer at each occasion: “Thank you, God, for this great day and great family! Amen.” A few seconds later, she starts again: “Oh! I forgot! And thank for this great food Mommy made. Amen.”
Zachary is a different creature all together. He has a much more tangible personality. It takes some persuading to win him. He’s strong and confident and somewhat the skeptic. He is multi-layered. With Isabel — what you see is what you get; with Zachary — you’re never quite sure what’s going on in his mind. We’ve struggled from the beginning with him and prayer time. He would scream whenever we prayed before meals, during morning devotions and before bed. He hated it and we hated that he hated it. Rick and I have been praying for months asking God to get a hold of this little guy’s heart and turn it toward Himself. Over the past month or so, we’ve seen a huge difference in Zach. He now patiently folds his hands before each meal. He quietly places his forehead on mine each night before bed. And now he has begun to pray for himself.
His prayers are not like Isabel’s. We have no idea what he is saying, really. It’s just a serene babble with “God” thrown in here and there. His hands folded neatly and his voice determined, he insists on praying first. And loudest. Oh, how I love the prayers of children! I wish I could hear the Spirit’s interpetation of these babbles, these sweet, heartfelt messages to God.
“We do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” — Romans 8:26 (NAS)
Being a Child
With her big blue eyes and soft curls, Isabel rested her face in her hands. She smiled the world’s purest smile and sighed. “It’s fun being a child.”
Sometimes I forget she’s only two. She’ll be three in a couple weeks, but she is still so young! Then such profound statements roll off her tongue … I am lost in the wonder of God. How could He pack so much delight, intelligence, creativity, perception and enthusiasm in such a tiny package? She is beyond amazing to me, and the God who created her is unfathomable. I cannot even begin to comprehend all that He is.
In addition to His character is the truth of His love.
“How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!” – 1 John 3:1 (NIV)
I think about Isabel’s statement. My teenage years were a blast! Without hesitation I admit: it’s fun being a teen. But being a child? That’s a different story. My parents’ divorce and the circumstances causing and extending from that filled my childhood with fear, doubt and insecurity. I didn’t know where I belonged and I never wanted to be where I was. I was lonely. I was lost. I was angry. It was not fun being a child.
I am so grateful Isabel and Zach have a different story. It is because of the differences they can enjoy their childhood. What was lacking in my childhood is present in theirs. Best of all, what is lacking from even their childhood is present in a relationship with God, the perfect Father.
As I’ve grown up, my ideas of fun have changed drastically. Once upon a fun always included a large group of people, wild activities and often loud music. Now, I love staying home and watching tv with only one person (my husband, of course). Fun isn’t always what you’re doing. It’s your circumstances and your attitude.
It’s fun being a child of God, not because we have the best toys and crazy parties, but because of the security and peace found in knowing we are fully loved by an awesome, faithful Father. It’s difficult to be bored when you recognize every day is a gift. You can’t easily be depressed when you have a Savior who not only sees past your superficial persona, but knows all your deepest, darkest secrets and loves you in spite of them. I’m not saying life is wonderful and filled with cotton candy. Christians have trials just like everybody else. But as children of God, we find security, safety, love, peace, joy, rest … everything we need and more in our Holy Father God. We know He is fully capable of anything and everything we request. Furthermore, we know He loves us and will give us what is best for us. In that we find immeasurable freedom. What’s more fun than freedom?
