In the Dailies

Have you been attacked by Hafftoos?

Some days I really don’t want to be an adult. Responsibility is great and all, but enough is enough. I don’t like having too many people depend on me because — What if I fail? What if I can’t make everyone happy? What if I don’t fail and then they expect even more? Can I give more? Maybe I’m not giving enough. All this can make life seem like a lot of work. I mean a LOT of work. And then what I always wanted can feel like a burden. Not because I’ve changed my wants, but because I’ve changed my perspective.

I love having a clean house. Not because I enjoy cleaning; I actually hate cleaning. But I love having a home where my family feels comfortable and safe and happy. Cleaning is less a chore when I remember that I want the results.

No little girl enthusiastically proclaims that she wants to change poopy diapers when she grows up. That’s absurd! But almost every little girl dreams of being a mama. We put up with the dirty diapers, the piles of laundry, the stressful job, all because we want what comes with it — a healthy child, a welcoming home, a successful career. Hafftoos want us to focus on how much we hate the task rather than how much we want what comes with it.

In my little fairy tale, the Father tells the princess to “Seek and remember.” That may mean different things to different people. Maybe you need to seek the Father. Maybe you need to seek a new job or a tangible solution to a problem you face. Maybe you need to remember why you’re doing what you’re doing. Maybe you need to remember how much you love your family or your responsibilities or even just the results of the chores you dislike. I don’t know what it means to you, but I know that God wants His children to experience joy. If we seek Him, He will be found. If we remember all He’s done for us, we cannot help but be overwhelmed by His love for us. And therein we find joy.

Sally Clarkson is a wonderful writer. You may know her as the author of The Mission of Motherhood. She has a new book titled Dancing with My Father that addresses this exact issue. How, when we’ve been worn down by life and burdened by both hurts and blessings, can we rekindle our first awe of God, that inextinguishable joy we possessed as new believers? Through biblical insights and real-life stories Sally encourages women to anticipate God’s presence and to trust Him to lead us into a life of passion and purpose.

We were not created to be weighed down by our to-do lists. As I’ve asserted many times on this blog, the christian life is not about DOING; it’s about BEING. It’s about becoming more Christ-like through every situation and stage of life. That includes living a life of perpetual joy.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying perpetual happiness! Joy and happiness are two different things. Happiness depends on circumstances, while joy is founded on the things that cannot and do not change — grace, mercy, love, salvation, God. Because of Christ we can live with deep-rooted joy even through the most debilitating trials.

Sally Clarkson’s book serves as a guide to finding our way back to the beginning. Don’t you miss those days of uninhibited delight in the Father? Me too. But I’m working to shed those inhibitions. I’m working to seek and remember so that I can dance freely once again.

Thank you to Random House for providing this book AND a giveaway copy!

But that’s not all …

Random House also gave me the new book by mother-daughter team Cheri Fuller and Ali Plum! See below for instructions on how to enter the giveaway.

I am blessed to have rare and beautiful relationships with both my mother and my mother-in-law. Some of my friends hate me for it. I’m completely spoiled in this area and I know it! The fact of the matter is that most women do not have positive relationships with their moms, be they their own or their husbands. This book — Mother-Daughter Duet — seeks to help women reach a harmonious relationship. As the subtitle states, it’s about “getting the relationship you want with your adult daughter.”

My daughter is six, so this book doesn’t apply to me. Yet. The text obviously targets the “mom” in the relationship more than the “daughter,” and I’m still the daughter. If you’re the mom, this is a great book to help you through those transitional years that start in high school continue … well, until you get it down. You may already have issues with your daughters or daughters-in-law. Or maybe you just anticipate the issues that are sure to come. Either way, this book gives you a faith-centered resource that can make the journey a little smoother.

Chapters discuss bridging generational gaps, allowing independence, offering respect and trust, bonding, surviving her wedding and much, much more. It offers sidebars of quotes, funny observations and helpful tips, but what I really appreciate are Ali’s contributions. Her mom, Cheri, wrote most of the book and did a fantastic job offering a conversation, easy and relevant read. Ali then included her perspective to the end of each chapter. As daughters, there are times want to say something to our moms, but we just can’t because of … whatever. We feel intimidated, embarrassed, or just misunderstood even before we open our mouths. These sections allow someone else to tell Mom what we’ve been wanting to say all along. She can get the point without us being involved. It’s a win-win situation.

So, I have TWO books to give away!!

ENTER TO WIN:

• Leave a comment on this post. If you prefer one book over the other, note that in your comment. (I can’t promise you’ll get it, but I’ll do my best.)
• Tweet about the giveaway or mention it in your facebook status — Be sure to let me know in a separate post!
• Subscribe to this blog. Again — leave a separate post to let me know.

I’ll announce a winner on Monday, March 8th. Come back then to see who wins!