Daily Archives: January 26, 2009
The machines are against me.
In the last two weeks I’ve seen sparks in my microwave, flames from my toaster and my beloved Ruthie died. Is this some sort of appliance apocalypse? The machines have turned against me! Well, the microwave is fine, though I’m still a little nervous using it. The toaster definitely died, and here’s a story for you.
Anyone know how much a toaster costs? Last week I bundled the kids and headed off to Bed, Bath & Beyond (since Linens & Things is now out of business) to buy a new toaster. We have four people in our family and, therefore, need a four-slotted toaster. Also, we live in Jersey, so our toaster needs to fit bagels. A four-slotted toaster that fits bagels = $70. Seventy dollars!! I expected fifteen, maybe twenty, but not seventy. I stood there for a while, debating who would get the cold pieces of toast if I settled for a two-slotter or if I should just bite the bullet and pay the obnoxious price they suggested for a family toaster. Frustrated I spun around to find a sales associate. This had to be a mistake -right? A typo, a poorly placed price tag. I didn’t find anyone who worked there, but I did find toaster ovens. Guess how much they cost. One was only thirty dollars! Yup. A toaster oven, that toasts six pieces of bread or six bagel halves, was half the price of a suitable toaster. Crazy. I spent the rest of the day reorganizing my kitchen cabinets to make room for my new toaster oven. I’m pretty psyched. I have a whole cabinet now devoted to appliances: crockpot, electric grill, toaster oven, immersion blender, etc. They look so pretty and happy in their new home.
At this point I should probably confess: I didn’t get the thirty dollar toaster oven. No, of course not. I still paid seventy dollars, but it can do so much more than toast bread, so I’m not feeling too guilty. Today we baked sugar cookies in it! Ellie is especially thrilled with this purchase. Since it’s small, she thinks it’s hers. We have a big oven for “Big Mama” (me) and a small oven for “Little Mama” (her). Someday I may tire of being called “Big Mama”, but for now I kinda like it. It’s endearing.
In closing, we’re ordering my Ruthie replacement tomorrow morning. My mom asked today if I would bury her. I don’t think I’m allowed to do that. Besides, I’d need a jackhammer to get through this frozen earth. The jackhammer would probably be against me, too. I don’t think I can risk it.
