An audience of One
Hey, all! Thank you for your prayers and kind encouragement while I was sick. I am feeling MUCH better — still not 100%, but I’m getting there. 
Yesterday the kids and I went to the mall. The last thing I wanted to do was make three separate lunches, as is our custom after Isabel gets home from school. After all, she, like me, is a nut for dairy, which, of course, Zachary can’t have. I always eat after they go to bed so — three lunches. Chicken or turkey for him, grilled cheese or pasta for her and a salad for me. Anyway, yesterday I didn’t feel like our usual routine, so I took the kids to the mall. Johnny Rockets. It was fun! But being at the mall, we certainly couldn’t just eat; we had to walk around a bit, too. First the pet store, then the toy store … then Mommy’s toy store: Williams Sonoma.
In this particular mall, Williams Sonoma is right next to an anchor store. This means there is a large open space in front of it. A few benches, trees planted in large pots and a small stage. Typically it holds seasonal decorations or someone playing piano. Yesterday it was just a big open platform. Isabel was immediately drawn to it.
“Mommy, I want to sit on this table!”
“It’s not a table, honey. It’s a stage. People sing and dance on it.”
Her eyes grew large and her face lit up, as if she had just discovered her purpose in life. Zachary couldn’t take the excitement sitting down. Before I knew it, he was out of the stroller and climbing right up there with her. The place was empty — it was Thursday afternoon — so I let them go.
Zach and Ellie stood straight, took deep breaths and belted out the sweetest version of “Jesus Loves Me,” their little voices testing the acoustics. A few people, all smiles, stopped to listen. A round of applause greeted the end of their song. My kids bowed low then launched into “Deep and Wide.”
Watching them, I was filled with joy and an odd incomprehension. They held no intimidation. No inhibitions. I seriously doubt they considered which song would be best received by their audience. Or maybe they already knew who their audience was — an audience of One.
I’m insecure even without being on stage in a mall. Even sitting in the back of a church of 3000, I temper my worship. I worry if I’m singing too loud or off-key. If I close my eyes, will I forget the words? If I raise my hands, will other people be watching? What will they think?
My children sang like David. Remember David dancing through the streets praising God? (2 Samuel 6) I can easily see my kids worshiping God the same way. Me? I’m more like David’s wife, Michal. Do you remember her response? She reprimanded David for embarrassing himself and her. She felt a king should never behave that way. Even at his wife’s condemnation, David wasn’t ashamed. In fact, he promised to dance even more for the glory of God and the humility of himself. “He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:30 (NAS)
May I become more like David, worshiping with abandon. May all I see and imagine blur until all I see is Him. Then may I belt it out knowing my audience of One is as enamored with me and I am with my children.
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Posted on October 5, 2007, in child, Father, humility, praise, singing. Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.
Ah, “Deep and wide”–that’s what it’s all about! : )
oh wow, how beautiful…I wished I could have been a part of their audience, I would have given them a standing ovation..
Beautiful thoughts, Tanya. It goes so well with an article I’m working on right now about worship. Thanks for some additional inspiration!
SP: I’d love to read your article! Let me know when it’s finished.
hey tanya!
i’m just now getting this blog-business figured out…so, I FOUND YOU!!! tag-you’re it! hehe.
I LOVE this story.
I will carry “An Audience of One” in my heart at Glorieta and speak boldly the message God has on my heart…w/o fear…w/o insecurity, because it’s all for the praise of “An Audience of One.”
Thank you so much for sharing =)
The imagery and the message of this post have stayed with me for days.
My prayers echo yours. Lord, give me the boldness to live life with reckless abandon….
(Tanya, I love your blog!)
So true, Tanya! Well said!