Stop the Ripples
I am hiding from my children. Our bedroom, affectionately called “the cave”, is my only place of solitude. Well, a semi-solitude. The ramblings of our children still echo from the living room. Dora is singing somewhere in the background. Piles of laundry surround me, sprinkled with a few cheerios and matchbox cars. But this is the best I can find.
Our children are boycotting naps. I haven’t had a moment’s rest in a week and a half. That is, not while they are awake. I haven’t written in that same amount of time. It’s killing me. I can’t even go to the bathroom without visitors to my throne or prying voices on the other side of the shower curtain.
So, what do I do? When I don’t have my “me-time” as our generation calls it; when I don’t have the quiet moments I need to recharge my batteries, I attack whoever is closest. I’ll grumble at Rick for leaving a wet towel on the floor. Even the mailman annoys me. If I am in the middle of disciplining Zachary and Isabel interrupts, who gets yelled at? Isabel. She likely is not the original source of frustration, but I spread my frustration to her. When I do not have my quiet moments, my reactions are disproportionate. Instead of smart-bombing problems, I use a more general ammunition, hitting innocent bystanders in the process. My grief and wrath ripple throughout the house. In turn, it ripples back. Isabel hits Zach because she knows she can’t hit me. Zach screams because he’s not as fast as she is, and poor Rick retreats until the storm blows over. I am left in the center facing the problems I alone created and amplified.
How much easier it would be to take a time-out in the beginning. Stop. Pray. Retreat to the cave before the warning bells ring and the turmoil is inevitable. As busy people it’s not always that simple. We run 24/7 with never enough time to accomplish all that needs to be done. We struggle to balance family life with career ambitions and spiritual callings. We are torn in every direction.
One of my favorite quotes is this: “There is never enough time to do all the nothing we want.” The problem is we don’t know what the nothing is versus the something. God knows what is most important for us. He knows how our priorities should align. If we don’t spend time with Him, how will we know what our somthings are? How will we know which demands are nothing and better neglected? We can’t. This is why we should seek him day and night. Even if it’s only a few solitary moments before rolling out of bed.
The good ripples, too. When I align my thoughts with God first thing, the rest of the day is better. My attitude is better, and everyone can tell the difference. Instead of loud, rushing voices, the house echos with laughter and sweet sentiments. Isabel hugs her brother instead of hitting him. Zach shares toys instead of stealing them. Rick is happy to come home instead of wishing he had a cave of his own. We don’t need to hide from each other! We find our rest in God. In the end, it’s not “me-time” that we need, it’s God-time.
Posted on June 26, 2007, in blame, encouragement, frustration, prayer, purpose, rest, time. Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.
This is so true! I am often at fault of this “ripple” effect when I’m frustrated. Seeking Him in all things keeps everything is prospective!
As short as the generations are, they all have their own “flavor”; I am thankful I was born in a generation that still had sights on one that didn’t know what “me time” is…you’re right, we need “God time.” As the scripture says, if we seek our life we lose it; “me time” can be a deception.
I just finished Anne of Ingleside, and it is full of the tales of Anne’s life as a wife and mother of six. Anne, the dreamer, the writer…an old college mate that she and Gilbert haven’t seen in years mocks her stay-at-home mother existence, throwing up her old dreams at her. Anne tells the woman that she is now writing “living epistles,” speaking of her children. : )
Satan is constantly searching for a crack in the wall; he is always attacking. Only through our vulnerability, is he able to penetrate into our minds and cuase damage.
Behold, the power of God!
Get rested, and stay strong.
Loretta
Thanks, ladies, for stopping by and leaving your encouraging comments! I always love hearing your thoughts.
Cami: I’ve not read that one! I started reading the Anne series years ago, but never made it through all the books. I got through Windy Poplars, I think, when she and Gil were setting up their home by the sea. I’ll have to pull the books out again.
Tanya,
thank you for this post! I have been a weary mama lately, and I could have handled my weariness better! I appreciate the reminder to always “align our thoughts with God” first thing, as you so aptly put it.
The grumpies come to us all, Tanya. I hope you get that time early in the morning–you are so right, it can change the outlook of the whole family. Every last one of us was no doubt right there with you as we read this,because we can so identify!
I can’t really add to the great comments you’ve already received, but I did want to say that I feel your pain, and I hope you get some quiet time soon.
Kristina
When My kids were younger I never seemed to have any “me time” and I would do as you did, take it out on the person who was the closest without thinking who I would hurt..Now I have all the time in the world and totally miss the chaos and my little kids..however, what I have now is more “God Time” which has opened a whole new discovery of challenges with Him..
Like you,Tanya, I have also only read one book from The series ” Anne Of Green Gables” and I too am going to try and get a hold of copies to read them..